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Home > Psychologies > 145 > “I am not my emotions”

“I am not my emotions”

Our feelings can guide us, and fill our lives with warmth and colour – yet some negative emotions bring little else but pain. Here, three writers search for the meaning of – and the antidote to – envy, guilt and resentment

psychology

Envy

Danielle Woodward takes a reality check with the green-eyed monster

While visiting friends recently, I had a serious case of house envy. On my tour around their new loft extension, an adults-only retreat from their children’s chaos, I sighed as my feet sank into the luxurious carpet and I took in the sleek, relaxing decor.

‘What do you think?’ my friend asked, beaming joyfully at the renovation.

‘It’s lovely,’ I replied through gritted teeth, trying to ignore the sinking feeling in my stomach and the urge to scream, ‘It’s not fair – I want this, too!’

‘The tendency to feel a pang of envy at another’s good fortune is universal,’ says psychotherapist Patricia Polledri, author of Envy In Everyday Life (Clink Street Publishing, £9.99). ‘And it is so unpleasant and negative that we would rather not think about it.’

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About Psychologies

If you're feeling depleted, out of sorts and ready for a holiday, then this issue is for you. Our 18-page dossier on how to renew your strength shares scientifically proven ways to fill up your tank and keep it full. If you’re hitting the beach but want to revolutionise the way you see yourself, turn to page 46 and learn about the new mindset to adopt to finally find peace with your body. This month, we invite you to train your brain to think differently but we also invite you to sing, dance and play. Why? Because it’s not only good for your soul, it’s good for your health. Learn how the arts can help you live a long, happy life. Here’s to a long, happy summer!
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