‘N
ow smile’, my friend directs me, having applied blusher to my cheeks. I’m sitting on a huge bed – not mine – but one we’re sharing at a yoga retreat where we’ve come for some body and soul nurturing following the disintegration of our marriages. I’ve made a commitment to improve my fitness with more exercise and a healthier diet, and in the process I’ve lost some weight. My baggy wardrobe has been exchanged with outfits that make me feel good and, following the Shakti tantra course, I’ve made a list of my most outrageous desires and stuck it on my fridge, reminding me of what I need to prioritise.
Now, my friend tells me, I’m ready; it’s time I started dating, which these days means creating an online profile. ‘I don’t have good photos’, I complain, in my last-ditch attempt to stall the humiliating process of publicly admitting I’m looking for a lover, but she’s not having any of it.
ILLUSTRATION: JESSICA DURRANT/GETTY IMAGES