“Welcome to the human race.” The Time Team finds love in the unlikeliest of places (er, BBC iPlayer), but wonders what it takes to be a Doctor Who fan.

Compiled by BENJAMIN COOK

Gerard, Luke, Beth, Miles and Zainab mime ‘Love & Monsters’ ahead of their latest Time Team session.

Photographs by SAIMA KHALID

This issue’s Time Team: Beth Axford, Gerard Groves, Luke Cutforth, Miles Hall and Zainab Sheriff

“I very much consider them fans. They are.

That’s a fact”, Russell T Davies insisted in 2009, when Doctor Who Magazine asked the then-showrunner whether he considers viewers who have been hooked by the revived, 2005+ show to be ‘fans’ in the same way as the old guard.

“I think some journalists try to restrict the definition of fandom to male, internet-bound merchandise-buyers”, he continued, “because that’s an easy stereotype – and then in turn some fans like that, because they’d prefer to be exclusive – but the vast majority of fans welcome everyone in. Especially the kids, because that’s the lifeblood.”

Ten years later, and five of those ‘kids’ – Time Teamers Beth, Gerard, Luke, Miles and Zainab, who all became fans during those heady, mid-noughties teatimes – gather in a north-west London living room on a Saturday evening to watch one of Doctor Who’s most divisive episodes. “Love & Monsters! Finally!” exclaims Gerard as DWM loads it up on iPlayer.

“WOOHOO! I’ve been waiting for this one…”

Beth’s thrilled too. “I’M SCREAMING!” she screams. “I LOVE this episode. If I’d known, I’d have cosplayed as Jackie Tyler. Or Ursula. Or the Abzorbaloff. Or the Abzorbaloff with Jackie and Ursula’s faces – the perfect storm.”

OK, there’s a lot of love in the room right now. (It is almost Valentine’s Day.) Then, as we’re about to hit play, Russell T Davies – who wrote Love & Monsters – texts DWM: “I can’t believe you Time Team on a Saturday night! I love you ALL.”

“Oh. My. God”, says Beth.

“He’s a legend”, says Luke.

“I could kiss him”, says Miles.

Quick, uncork the pinot noir. Crank up the Il Divo. It’s a bit hot in here. And it’s about to get hotter…

LOVE & MONSTERS (2006)

LINDA members Bridget (Moya Brady), Elton (Marc Warren), Mr Skinner (Simon Greenall), Ursula (Shirley Henderson) and Bliss (Kathryn Drysdale).

Rose (Billie Piper) and the Doctor (David Tennant) take on the Hoix (Paul Kasey).

Elton’s vlog.

Fast, handheld, urgent. A man – Elton – is running, running, running across an urban wasteland. Then he stops dead. Ahead of him: a police box – the Doctor’s TARDIS – parked outside a derelict warehouse.

GERARD: “Amazing shot! What would you do if you saw that in real life? You’d assume it was a prop, wouldn’t you?”

LUKE: “When I was making Doctor Who fan films, I tried to buy a TARDIS off the internet – a wooden TARDIS.”

BETH: “You made fan films?!”

GERARD: “I did too.”

LUKE: “I made loads. I was, like, ten. I remade Rose [2005]. And I did one where a tornado came down from the sky and took away a boy. And one where this guy gets hit by a meteor, then gets up.”