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Digital Subscriptions > iScot Magazine > February/March 2019 > For those about to rock…

For those about to rock…

ALL GREAT stories – even moderately interesting ones too, actually – must start somewhere. Obvious, but true. This particularly scintillating piece of investigative journalism was triggered by a rant from our glorious leader on Twitter – some of you may have seen it? Yes, Ken McDonald, heid bummer and driving force behind our estimable, award-winning publication had lost it. Again!

This time the cause of his vexation was rock or, to be more precise, his inability to source Scottish made rock. The Scottish Twitterati were on to the scandal in a flash. Sterling defences of Edinburgh rock by ‘Graham’ were repelled by an increasingly irate Ken as he recalled childhood experiences that have clearly shaped the man he has become: “It just reminds me of chalk Graham, and it was always tiny toatie sized and nothing like a manly dod o rosy red Helensburgh rock as I recall. I think I concussed my brother hitting him oan the napper trying to break it. Cannae day that wi Edinburgh rock, tae be honest!”

A glimmer of light was offered by esteemed linguist Ally Heather, and that, dear reader, is where this story finally gets to the point…

Following Ally’s prompting to the letter, your trusty correspondent immediately located the relevant keys that led directly to the Visit Angus website, where they helpfully tell us, “Star Rock Shop is the oldest sweet shop in Scotland, [having] continuously been producing rock for the past 185 years from the same premises”. Jings! Mibbees Uncle Ken can get his rock in Kirriemuir and we can all live happily ever after… Finally, some journalistic nous sets in and, on further research, we discover the devastating news that… the Star Rock Shop is up for sale! Help ma boab! But, never fear, here at iScot Magazine we fact-check everything rigorously, so we were never going to just rely on some quick googling to get to the root of this confectionery conundrum. By the way, I should’ve mentioned that the other factor affecting this particular newsgathering extravaganza was that Ken had his rock-induced meltdown affy close to publication deadline day! But, dinnae fash, Kirrie’s no that far fae Dundee…

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