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“I spent a decade running away from relationships”

It took burnout and an ME diagnosis for Amanda Challans to process her feelings

Until 10 years ago, non-commitment was my default pattern. I never stuck with a relationship, worked as a freelance management consultant rather than get tied into a job and spent time on long, remote expeditions. FOMO was an issue; I always felt there may be something better around the corner. I told myself I didn’t want to settle down. In my mid 20s, I burned out and was diagnosed with ME. For a couple of years, I was either bed-bound or in a wheelchair. I was told that there was no cure. Desperate, I studied everything I could to see what might help - psychology, physiology, nutrition and biology. I read about attachment and, gradually, I began to understand that some traumatic experiences in my childhood had led to me having a heavily avoidant attachment style.

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