We use cookies to track usage and preferences. See Cookie Policy
Pocketmags Digital Magazines
Pocketmags Digital Magazines
Christmas Presents
   You are currently viewing the Italy version of the site.
Would you like to switch to your local site?
Digital Subscriptions >  Latest Articles > Feline relations

Feline relations
Your Cat

Feline relations

Posted domenica 10 maggio 2015   |   898 views   |   Family & Home   |   Comments (0) With George’s advances on female cat Roscoe wearing thin, Tom Cox takes drastic action...

Have you drugged that cat,” said my dad. My girlfriend Gemma and I, and our cat George, were in our living room, in Devon, talking to my mum and dad, who were in their living room, in Nottinghamshire.

This strange voodoo was being made possible by the Facetime app on my laptop. My laptop wasn’t actually on my lap, but on the table in front of us, as my lap was occupied by George. My parents had hoped their cat Floyd might join in too, but he was out killing between 16 and 30 mice.
George, who was upside down and staring beatifically at the camera, was behaving exactly as I’d hoped: utterly mellow and at one with the world. This being pretty much his default mode, apart from the times when our female cat, Roscoe, is in the vicinity, at which point he turns into a rampant sex maniac.

“So,” I said to my parents. “What do you reckon?”

“Ooh, I don’t know,” said my mum. “Does he scratch the furniture?”

I thought back to a couple of hours earlier, when I’d found George hanging off the back of my favourite 1960s Swedish chair by two claws. “No, we’ve never seen him do it,” I said.

“Hmmm,” said my mum. “He does seem very nice. I don’t know. You’re making this very difficult for us.”

Gemma and I had really hoped to keep George, who was probably the most laid-back cat I’d ever met, but his repeated attempts to hump Roscoe, despite being neutered, had made Gemma and I reconsider — especially now Roscoe was spending increasing amounts of time away from the house. I wanted George to live in a rural place, with no major roads nearby, so my plan was to wear my mum and dad down. After all, they had plenty of space, and only one cat, Floyd, who, despite the mass slaughter, always seemed pretty sociable. That’s what I’d thought, anyway.
A couple of weeks later, I packed George into the car and drove five hours north east. George took the upheaval in an impressively philosophical manner, though was slightly less happy to be set upon by a small evil badger cat, a day or two later. How had I not noticed how sharp Floyd’s claws were before? How downright hard he was? George looks slightly Buddha-like and serene next to most cats, but the effect was particularly extreme when he was next to an advancing Floyd.

We gave it a bit of time, but it was clear there was not going to be any gradual mellowing of relations here.

“I feel terrible,” my dad commented. “There’s a pain in my heart.”

I felt awful too. How could I have subjected George, who’d only ever given me love, to this? Having discounted my dad’s tongue-in-cheek suggestion of leaving George there, taking Floyd back with me and discarding him on Dartmoor — “He’d probably bring down a pony before too long: that’d keep him going for winter” — I headed back to Devon, with George and his scratched nose in tow.

Since then, Floyd has returned to his former, lovable self, and George has effortlessly resumed life here, seemingly without holding any form of grudge. His future seems uncertain, but for now we’re coping. That is to say: I’m spending a large portion of my day acting like a personal bodyguard for Roscoe, making sure she manages to get in and out of the house without being leaped on. At these moments I sometimes think back to the time I lived in a big city and the nearest thing I had to a pet was an unusually big spider plant. “Would I want that life back?” I ask myself. Not in a million years.

For more great articles like this get the Your Cat Magazine FREE SAMPLE ISSUE issue of Your Cat below or subscribe and save.

Single Issue - Your Cat Magazine January 2018 Replica Edition included
Or 349 points
Annual Digital Subscription
Only € 1,83 per issue
Or 2199 points
6 Month Digital Subscription
Only € 2,00 per issue
Or 1199 points

View Issues

About Your Cat

Your Cat is the must-have magazine for all cat lovers and owners – every issue is packed with information you need to keep your cat happy, safe and healthy.

More great content like this...

For more great articles like this subscribe to Your Cat today.

Most read articles this month

How do digital magazines work?

How do digital magazines work?

Digital magazines can seem like an alien experience for devoted magazine fans. Where will you be without that new glossy magazine smell? The sound of the page turning? A quiet half hour to just devour the latest news and views on your favourite hobby? More...
 3 Vegan Nice Creams from Vegan Food & Living

3 Vegan Nice Creams from Vegan Food & Living

The shades are out, the sunscreen is on and all you need to complete your summer chill is the best ice cream! More...
7 Ways to Stick to Your Workout with Your Fitness

7 Ways to Stick to Your Workout with Your Fitness

Whether it’s a busy schedule, life commitments or simply a lack of motivation, it can be tough to stay on track with your exercise regime. Your Fitness magazine asked Jim and Fiona Crossley, the founders of F45 Kingston (f45kingston.co.uk), for their tips on how to keep up with your training and achieve your fitness goals. More...
Carping4Heroes weekend raises £10k

Carping4Heroes weekend raises £10k

More than £10,000 was raised for Help for Heroes during the Carping4Heroes weekend, held for the first time at Cudmore Fisheries, Staffordshire. More...
Christmas Gifts for Her

Christmas Gifts for Her

Stuck for gift ideas for the lovely lady in your life? The Pocketmags team have pooled all their best ideas for gifts for her this Christmas. Get ready to earn some serious brownie points! More...
STAFF PICK: Look magazine

STAFF PICK: Look magazine

Kate Ashley reviews Look magazine More...
Nadiya Hussain's Tiramisu Cake

Nadiya Hussain's Tiramisu Cake

Nadiya tells Great British Food magazine: “The smell of strong coffee makes my stomach turn, but strangely enough I can just about bear the pain if I know it’s about to be mixed into cake, or tiramisu. Or – best of all – tiramisu cake!” More...
STAFF PICK: F1 Racing magazine

STAFF PICK: F1 Racing magazine

Steven Mikellides reviews F1 Racing More...
Failsafe  fingering

Failsafe fingering

In answer to a reader’s question, Graham Fitch addresses the complex subject of how to find fingering that works for you More...
7 reasons we love digital magazines

7 reasons we love digital magazines

Devoted to digital or passionate about print? Whichever side of the fence you're on, at Pocketmags we think everyone should give digital magazines a go. Here's why we love 'em. More...
Vouchers Carte Regalo Un abbonamento rivista è il regalo perfetto , ma avrete bisogno di qualcosa da mostrare il grande giorno. Altro
Modalità di pagamento Pocketmags Payment Types
A Pocketmags si ottiene Fatturazione sicura Ultime offerte HTML Reader Regali Loyalty Points