MajorBloodnok, Agony Aunt

Heed my wisdom or I’ll set the Boys’ Brigade on you

Twitter: @MajorMcBloodnok

Dear Major,

I understand that during the recent General Election campaign Theresa May’s held numerous ‘public meetings’. How important do you think they were in determining the outcome?

V_ask_ze_Kvestions

Dear V ,

Yes, throughout the campaign there were very popular rallies held at various accessible venues such as disused airfields, locked basements and remote village halls booked out as children’s’ parties. Sadly Mr Tumble (Boris Johnson) could not attend any of them but instead the audience consisted of carefully selected members of the public comprising predominantly racist Tory Councillors, no-hope candidates, election agents, their spouses, servants and their servants’ dogging partners.