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Out Classed

David Woodfine has been writing short stories in various genres for two years and has been shortlisted previously in WM competitions, but this is his first competition win. He lives and works in Leeds.

‘What are you doing there?’

Well, quite. What was I doing there? It was a fair question. Apposite, even. It was certainly a question to which if I were to provide an accurate answer, it would have unfortunate consequences for me.

‘What are any of us doing here, my dear fellow?’ I tried.

He kept staring at me. It was evident that here was a chap unlikely to be distracted by existential debate and requiring rather more specific an answer. But what to tell him?

I could tell him that I was a successful if faintly anachronistic gentleman thief in an exquisitely-cut suit and MCC tie who had slipped into this private side room at the museum with a view to purloining a priceless set of Ancient Greek coins known as the Syracuse Horde.

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