GAMES THAT CHANGED MY LIFE DIRK KUYT

WELCOME

It took Harry Kane just 79 seconds to

ALLY McCOIST

“The Scottish government had an emergency meeting over me and Neil Lennon having a chat on the sidelines! It was well over the top”

MEANWHILE In …

...Rwanda, Sergio Ramos shrugged off a difficult season in the obvious way – with a spot of gorilla trekking

CHAOS OF CONIFA

The world’s weirdest tournament has faced yet more confusion

THE ULTIMATE QUIZ

Get stuck into these teasers on World Cup all-stars, FA Cup-winning captains and ex-Prem bosses abroad...

PESCARA

Dolphins aren’t cuddly in Italy: on course for relegation, they turn to violence

REQUIRED READING

SQUARE PEG, ROUND BALL Ned Boulting (Bloomsbury, £16.99)

NEDUM ‘STAYIN’ ALIVE’ ONUOHA

The ex-Man City stopper on kicking Bee Gees where it hurts, Zlatan weirdos and flinging fish fingers

MY FOOTBALL

Sex Pistols legend and Public Image Limited founder Johnny Rotten is a lifelong Gooner and fires a real cannon, but Bovril is even deadlier...

COMEDIAN TO CAMBODIA

A stand-up has jetted to Asia to take charge of a second division team

RYAN GRAVENBERCH

The Dutch midfielder is one of Europe’s hottest prospects, after Erik ten Hag made him Ajax’s youngest ever debutant

WHAT’S ON ETHIN GYOU HATE ABOUT FOOTBALL?

✱ STAR TWEET Martin Tyler shouting “AND IT’S

WAZZA SAID THAT ONE DAY I’D BREAK HIS RECORD – AND I’VE STILL GOT MANY MORE YEARS IN ME

International defenders, beware: Harry Kane is going nowhere for quite some time yet. Spurs’ talisman is on the verge of breaking Wayne Rooney’s England goals record – and happily prepared to make life hard for anyone who attempts to topple him, as he tells FFT…

KLOPP, THE HUMAN LIGHTHOUSE AND SEXY SANTA

When Harry Kane reaches Wayne Rooney’s tally of 53 England goals, he’ll join a motley crew of record scorers around the world who are leading the way for their respective nations, some better known than others…

ART IS LIFE

Twenty years ago, Zinedine Zidane’s impossible swoosh of a left boot led to the greatest goal in Champions League history; the signature act of a footballing icon in motion. And yet, for all his magic, this gritty son of Marseille often diverted attention from the conflicted soul within...

NEVERKUSEN: THE HAT-TRICK OF HORROR

When Zidane scorched home his stunner in 2002, he didn’t just extinguish Bayer Leverkusen’s European hopes – that goal also completed a treble of major trophy misery, after the most agonising collapse in football history...

THE WAR ON CRYPTO

Fans have hissed and eye-rolled as NFTs and bewildering terminology have crept into the footballsphere – and now things are getting serious, with crypto investment group WAGMI United’s takeover of Crawley Town. But is the growing fear among traditional supporters fair or unfounded? FFT goes in search of answers…

HEROES& & VILLANS

In February 1982, Aston Villa’s greatest manager Ron Saunders resigned. Within four months, the Villans stunned Bayern Munich to become European champions – and now, 40 years on, their heroes tell FFT how. Just don’t read over dinner…

"MY DAD WOULD HAVE BEEN SO PROUD SEEING ME AT NEWCASTLE–BUT I’M GLAD HE WASN’T AROUND TO WATCH IT”

Steve Bruce managed the Mags’ arch rivals Sunderland and fought off rogue cabbages at Aston Villa before living out his boyhood dream at St James’ Park – but the reality was rather more haunting. The man himself tells FFT he has no regrets… even if he wishes some things had finished differently

WHEN ENGLAND... WON?!

In 1997, England triumphed at a fun-filled tournament that featured Italy, France and Brazil. Le Tournoi has since become synonymous with one event, but it’s also the Three Lions’ sole notable success in 25 years. FFT flicks on the nostalgia filter…

DEBAUCHED IMPRISONED SURVIVED

He embarrassed Arsenal, angered his bosses, enjoyed some, ahem, ‘special’ times in the Stamford Bridge centre circle, and even had a stretch at Her Majesty’s pleasure. There’s only one Mickey Thomas, alright – and he’s cheated death to regale FFT with a few tales

MY PERFECT XI

ADEBAYO AKINFENWA

AROUND THE GROUNDS

EFL • NON-LEAGUE • SCOTLAND

THE PLAYER’S GONNA PLAY

Glasgow City’s Tyler Dodds isn’t just a flying winger competing at the summit of Scottish football – she’s also a talented singer with a headline-friendly act...

BEST & WORST HULL CITY

Rick Skelton, the avid Tiger behind Boothferry to Wembley, on Windass worldies and the local Scrappy-Doo

IAN HOLLOWAY

FFT’s columnist is still coming down after the high of Bristol Rovers’ stunning final-day promotion from League Two, overseen by Joey Barton. It didn’t start well for him, says ‘Ollie’ – but that’s why young bosses need time

TAMPLIN: A TERRIBLE TRAIL

Eccentric former Billericay Town and Romford owner Glenn Tamplin quit football for good in March last year – and now his two old sides have both been relegated

CLAIMS TO FAME

SWINDON

“I HAD TO AVOID EVERYTHING ABOUT LOSING TO UNITED IN ’99 FOR YEARS. I JUST FELT DEAD”

The two-time Champions League winner talks Paul Lambert’s no-nonsense genius – and why he rejected the Germany job

“JOSE COULD BE PRETTY COLD AT TIMES – HE JUST DIDN’T GIVE ME A FAIR CHANCE”

The ex-England man recalls West Ham’s infamous drop, fall-outs with Mou – and why Liverpool flopped under Roy

“I RANG UP MY WIFE EVERY NIGHT AT ITALIA 90 – THEN ASKED TO PUT THE DOG ON ”

The Scotland-born Ireland hero on the letter that sealed his move to Boro, and meeting Pope John Paul II at the Vatican

“THE SPURS PHYSIO GAVE ME A DAVID LLOYD CARD AN DSAID TO GO THERE – I THOUGHT HE MUST HAVE BEEN JOKING!”

The Swiss chats Serie A glory days, trying to buy Pompey – and running for FIFA’s top job