Mindful life
Whether I’m walking to the shops or running for the train or getting into bed at the end of the day, Iam haunted by a single ominous thought: you are running out of time. My birthday is soon, and all I can think about is how much older Iam than I feel. The age Iam about to turn, 28, fills me with a visceral sense of horror and dread.
The fact that I ruminate on my age quite so repetitively may be asymptom of obsessive-compulsive disorder. And I’m also aware that this is a common feeling for many, if not most, people. Nearly all of us hit an age after which getting older feels surreal, a travesty, fundamentally wrong. But I can’t help but wonder if my worries have been exacerbated by the pandemic, and whether many of us are only just beginning to feel the implications of Covid-19.