The parents of a pupil recently contacted me to say that their daughter was refusing point blank to practise her violin at home. The situation was causing so much tension within the family that they had come to the decision to stop lessons with immediate effect, and they would simply pay half a terms fees in lieu of notice. When a child decides to stop playing, it can be for a variety of reasons. Maybe a different instrument appeals more or maybe practising has been difficult. Time management is often an issue. Whatever the reason, its important to have an honest and embarrassment-free conversation with the pupil (and their parents) about their thoughts and feelings, and once the decision has been made, to make a plan to ensure the very best possible finish. An abrupt cessation of lessons is rarely the right way to go as it allows little time for reflection. In any case most teachers have a written contract with parents that includes a set notice period. Rather than grimly seeing through the remaining weeks of term with a feeling of reluctance, it is so important for teachers to embrace this time as an opportunity to celebrate the childs achievements on their instrument, and highlight all the transferable musical and nonmusical skills that they can take forward from the learning experience.
An abrupt cessation of lessons is rarely the right way to go
An obvious way of creating a sense of success is to work towards a goal. One boy I taught a few years ago was a talented young singer, with a keen ear and a natural sense of musicianship. His brother played the violin, so he had started lessons too. Although he made good progress, it soon became clear that he disliked the sound of the violin and the sensation of the chin rest against his jaw. After some discussion, he decided to go all out and take Grade 1 (which he aced with a distinction) before moving on to a brass instrument. Our last lesson was a joyful occasion which gave him time to reflect on everything he had achieved on the violin and to look ahead to new challenges with confidence.