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3 MIN READ TIME
1950–2022

ROBBIE COLTRANE

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Total Film
December 2022
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EVERY ISSUE
Welcome to
Come on in! The water’s fine! Yep, we’re
‘IN EVERY FILM THAT I HAVE DONE, THE MISTAKES ARE MINE. I ALWAYS TOOK THE LAST DECISIONS.’
ALEJANDRO G. IÑÁRRITU
SCREEN
THE WORLD’S MOST TRUSTED MOVIE REVIEWS
Dialogue
Mail, rants, theories etc.
60 SECOND SCREENPLAY
TF SAVES YOU THE COST OF A MOVIE EVERY MONTH. THIS ISSUE: BEAST
TEASERS
TEASERS
NO STRINGS ATTACHED
HOT RIGHT NOW
LILY-ROSE DEPP IS SINKING HER TEETH INTO THE GOOD STUFF…
FAMILY VALUES
WEDNESDAY Tim Burton’s TV debut explores the turbulent school days of a teenage proto-goth.
MAJORS CONFLICT
CREED III Old friend becomes new foe in MBJ’s toughest-ever tussle…
THE STATE OF THE UNION
THE PEOPLE WE HATE AT THE WEDDING Anglo-American family nuptials go comically pear-shaped.
DREAM PALACE
EMPIRE OF LIGHT Sam Mendes takes on movies, mental health, and the mighty Margate…
CLOSE TO HOME
REBEL Batgirl directing duo Adil & Billal bounce back with a wartime musical tragedy.
ROYAL PEDIGREE
CORSAGE Vicky Krieps shines in Marie Kreutzer’s mischievous portrait of an Austrian empress desperate to escape her gilded cage.
SOUND BYTES
The month in dialogue and digits.
MURDER MYSTERY
LITVINENKO George Kay takes us inside the perilous world of his new crime series…
SHORT CUTS
The latest happenings in movieland…
NEXT BIG THING
JALYN HALL HAS A DREAM…
CAN WE TALK A BOUT?
LOSING INDEPENDENT CINEMAS CMI’S COLLAPSE SIGNALS A STARK FUTURE FOR UK INDEPENDENT EXHIBITION.
ELF DEFENCE
THE WITCHER: BLOOD ORIGIN A prequel series that dives into the history of the Continent.
STRAIGHT SHOOTER
COPENHAGEN COWBOY Nicolas Winding Refn rides in for the strangest horse opera…
BETWEEN TAKES
GUY PEARCE
FOOL FOR LOVE
MAMMALS James Corden makes a dramatic comeback for a TV comedy of crisis and romance.
MIND GAMES
NOCEBO Vivarium director Lorcan Finnegan is back noodling noggins…
IT SHOULDN’T HAPPEN TO A FILM JOURNALIST
Editor-at-Large JAMIE GRAHAM lifts the lid on film journalism.
BAD ROBOT
CHRISTMAS BLOODY CHRISTMAS Grindhouse guru Joe Begos gifts viewers a crazed robo-Santa swinging a bloody great axe…
THE HERO
MARK RYLANCE THE STAGE AND SCREEN THESP TALKS METHOD AND MITCHUM
THIS ISSUE
A Bigger Splash
The long-awaited sequel to the highest-grossing film of all time and the opening chapter in a fully conceived four-film saga, Avatar: The Way Of Water is a 13-years-in-the-making return trip to cinema’s most immersive world. Total Film plunges back into Pandora with James Cameron, the film’s cast and its crew to uncover the bigger, bolder, even bluer sequel.
’dunit again
After the unexpectedly huge success of Knives Out, Benoit Blanc is back on another case. Total Film meets writer/ director Rian Johnson, returning star Daniel Craig and a new line-up of potential suspects/victims for clues on how to crack the murdermystery follow-up.
QUEST IN SHOW
Thirty-four years after the original movie, the dry spell finally ends with Willow, an eight-part continuation on Disney+. Warwick Davis and his fellow adventurers reveal why it’s time for a new kind of magic…
RED ALERT
AFTER ESCAPING RUSSIAN PRISONS AS RED GUARDIAN IN BLACK WIDOW AND BATTLING THE UPSIDE DOWN AS CHIEF JIM HOPPER IN STRANGER THINGS, DAVID HARBOUR IS NOW SUITED AND BOOTED AS SANTA CLAUS IN COMEDY ACTION-THRILLER VIOLENT NIGHT. TOTAL FILM TALKS TO THE STAR WHOSE HALTING CAREER BECAME ALL GREEN LIGHTS WHEN HE STARTED SEEING RED IN HIS FORTIES…
PASSION PROJECT
Nearly a century after Lady Chatterley’s Lover first made readers clutch their pearls, a new adaptation promises to sizzle with as much sexual politics as sauce.
HUNGER GAMES
Florence Pugh continues her patriarchy-smashing form with pertinent period drama THE WONDER. She and her filmmaking team tell Total Film how a Victorian tale of fasting and fables reflects the conflicts of a modern audience.
TOXIC SHOCK
FROM HITLER ACADEMICS TO MEDICATED MUMS, WHITE NOISE IS AN EPIC SATIRE ON AMERICA. ADAPTING DON DELILLO’S ‘UNFILMABLE’ NOVEL, IT’S ALSO DIRECTOR NOAH BAUMBACH’S MOST AMBITIOUS MOVIE YET. TOTAL FILM MEETS HIM AND HIS CAST TO DISCUSS DEATH, DRUGS, AND DANCING.
SCREEN
AFTERSUN 12A
Halcyon daze…
GUILLERMO DEL TORO’S PINOCCHIO PG
Accept nose substitutes…
THE MENU 15 TBC
Kitchen nightmare…
MATILDA THE MUSICAL PG
Schoolgirl power…
MY POLICEMAN 15
★★☆☆☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS, PRIME VIDEO Harry Styles
RETROGRADE TBC
★★★☆☆ OUT 11 NOVEMBER CINEMAS Matthew Heineman’s (Cartel Land)
HOUSE OF
DARKNESS 15 ★★★☆☆ OUT NOW DIGITAL Neil LaBute’s
NANNY 15
WARNER, AMAZON, NATIONAL GEOGRAPHIC, DOGWOOF, ALTITUDE, REPUBLIC FILM,
BONES AND ALL TBC
Meat cute…
CAUSEWAY TBC
Jennifer’s buddy… ★★★★☆ OUT NOW APPLE TV+ W
LADY CHATTERLEY’S LOVER 15
She got gamekeeper…
YOU WON’T BE ALONE 15
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW DIGITAL A shape-shifting witch shares
HONG KONG: CITY ON FIRE TBC
★★★★☆ OUT 22 NOVEMBER CINEMAS This revealing doc
LYNCH/OZ 15
★★★☆☆ OUT 2 DECEMBER CINEMAS After incisive docs
WHAT DO WE SEE WHEN WE LOOK AT THE SKY? U
★★★★☆ OUT 25 NOVEMBER CINEMAS From vocal seedlings
THE WONDER 15
Fast friends…
WEIRD: THE AL YANKOVIC STORY TBC
Accordion in progress…
SHE SAID 15
A history of silence…
RAYMOND & RAY 15
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW APPLE TV+ Ewan McGregor and
GOOD NIGHT OPPY PG
★★★★☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS 23 NOV PRIME VIDEO
NEPTUNE FROST TBC
★★★★☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS Afrofuturist cine-poem or protest
LYLE, LYLE, CROCODILE PG
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS There’s a definite Paddington
TORI AND LOKITA 15
★★★☆☆ 2 DECEMBER CINEMAS Jean-Pierre and Luc Dardenne’s
CLARA SOLA 15
★★★★☆ OUT 18 NOVEMBER CINEMAS A 40-year-old woman
A BUNCH OF AMATEURS 12A
★★★★☆ OUT 11 NOVEMBER CINEMAS The amateurs in
HE’S WATCHING 15
UNIVERSAL, PICTUREHOUSE, PECCADILLO, BLUE FINCH, SIGNATURE, ALTITUDE, SKY
THE SILENT TWINS TBC
Sister pact…
NO BEARS TBC
★★★☆☆ OUT 11 NOVEMBER CINEMAS Despite being currently
HUNT 15
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS, DIGITAL Squid Game’s Lee
FINAL CUT 15
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW DIGITAL An amiable zom-com from
AISHA 12A
★★★★☆ OUT 17 NOVEMBER CINEMAS, SKY Having fled
ARMAGEDDON TIME TBC
Gray matters…
HALLOWEEN ENDS 18
★★★☆☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS Flawed but fascinating, the
ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT 15
★★★★☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS, NETFLIX At turns both
ALL QUIET ON THE WESTERN FRONT 15
★★☆☆☆ OUT NOW DIGITAL After his misjudged heist
DEAR ZOE TBC
WARNER, PARAMOUNT, UNIVERSAL, SIGNATURE, NETFLIX, REEL 2 REEL,
CONFESS, FLETCH 15
Taking the Picasso…
THE WITCH: PART 2 18
★★★☆☆ OUT 28 NOVEMBER DIGITAL Subtitled The Other
THE WITCH: PART 2 18
★★☆☆☆ OUT NOW CINEMAS With Rise Of The
ARGENTINA, 1985 15
★★★★☆ OUT NOW PRIME VIDEO Santiago Mitre’s impressively
INCREDIBLE BUT TRUE 15
★★★★☆ OUT NOW BD Another bizarro tale from
BLACK ADAM 12
Rock of rages…
HIGHLANDER 15
MacLeod and ultra-clear… 1986 ★★★★☆ OUT NOW 4K
GHOSTWATCH 12
STUDIOCANAL, 101 FILMS, ARROW, BFI, DISNEY Mock docs
THE MUPPET CHRISTMAS CAROL U
Mock docs have never been so utterly, skintinglingly
CASQUE D’OR 12A
1952 ★★★★★ OUT 25 NOVEMBER CINEMAS, 4K UHD
THE DRAUGHTSMAN’S CONTRACT 15
1982 ★★★★☆ OUT 11 NOVEMBER CINEMAS 21 NOVEMBER
A BOY AND HIS DOG 15
1975 ★★★☆☆ OUT NOW BD EXTRAS ★★☆☆☆ Commentary,
VIDEODROME 18
Broadcast spews…
CHRISTMAS GIFT GUIDE
’Tis the season to be jolly flummoxed looking for the right pressies. Let us Rudolph you towards the best film/TV-related fare out there, starting with toys and games…
HOME PAGE
Time for some room service…
ON THE BUTTONS
Get your head in these games…
YULE TOGS
Garments of the galaxy…
SOUND CHOICES
Keeping Christmas on song…
TECH SUPPORT
The viewing party starts here…
PAPER BOON
Feel the need, the need to read…
GOLD DISCS
Gifts that keep on spinning…
BUFF
CINEMA CELEBRATED AND DEBATED. BOOSTING YOUR MOVIE GENIUS TO SUPERHERO LEVELS…
TOTAL FILM BUFF
IS IT BOLLOCKS?
Film Buff investigates the facts behind outlandish movie
ON LOCATION REEL SPOTS BEHIND THE CAMERA
20TH CENTURY STUDIOS, WARNER BROS, GETTY WHAT? Moneypenny
ALTERNATIVE BOX OFFICE
The biggest movies… WITH WATERY TITLES
BATHTUBS IN MOVIES
Brilliant baths
HINDSIGHT CORNER
November 2019 “I’ve gotten lighter, but he’s [his
FLOP CULTURE
In 2011, Martin Scorsese made a children’s film. But could his emotional cinephile fable overcome the challenges of Miss Piggy and shooting in 3D?
IS IT JUST ME OR IS THE BATMAN A TERRIBLE DETECTIVE?
To be fair, James Gordon isn’t much cop
LAST TIME SHOULD MOST MINISERIES BE MOVIES?
WARNER, DISNEY GILES HARRIS Nope, as they would
ANGELA LANSBURY
GETTY From Cukor to criminology, Broadway to broomsticks,
INTERMISSION
A WRITER TAKES PAUSE TO CONSIDER… His debt to a hairdresser called Rita.
MY MOVIE LIFE
DERREN BROWN THE MASTER OF PSYCHOLOGICAL ILLUSION ON THE FILMS THAT MOVE AND INSPIRE HIM
SAMANTHA MORTON
Keep on, Morvern…
KEY WORKS
20TH CENTURY STUDIOS, CHANNEL 4, TARTAN, ALAMY, GETTY
ELVES
Test your knowledge… Anyone who cheats is a son of a nutcracker!
NAME THE FRAME
Can you guess these eight underwater scenes?
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