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Farewell, my friend

As she says goodbye to her beloved dog, Suzy Walker knows not to bury her heartbreak - and seeks solace in the love they shared, and compassion for others

Sitting on the floor, I am holding Oscar, my little black spaniel, and he is licking away my tears… Over the years, I’ve become an expert at avoiding my negative feelings - distracting myself with box sets, getting too involved in other people’s dramas, losing hours of my life surfing mindlessly on my phone and numbing myself with wine or work. On my slow journey, however, I’ve learned that if I am constantly running away from the fear of feeling bad, sad or mad, I also miss out on feeling glad. Trying to run away from my feelings means I run away from the present moment and create a life of exhaustion and brittleness - looking at my life from the outside in, as if I’m at a window, an observer but never a participant.

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