Can you remember the last time you did something for yourself, by yourself? If the answer’s no, then – ironically – you’re not alone. In this always-connected world, solitude is a luxury many of us feel we can’t afford. A survey last year found some mothers only have 17 minutes per day of ‘me-time’. The demand for solo holidays is at an all-time high, while a US survey found that even young people are opting to travel on their tod rather than holiday with friends.
The psychological benefits of spending time in your own company are well documented. ‘Solid research says time spent alone improves our empathy and memory,’ says psychologist Dr Nick Baylis (drnickbaylis.com). ‘It creates deeper relationships, as you each nurture your own passions and grow as individuals, reconnecting again with more to share with each other.’ A Harvard study even found that it boosts creativity because, away from others’ judgement, we can let rip with our imaginations. There’s no doubt: a bit of space is good for you.
And yet we still worry what people will think of us if we go it alone. Will they assume that we have no friends? That we’re rejecting our loved ones? A study in the Journal Of Consumer Research revealed people are afraid of doing so-called ‘social’ activities, like going to the cinema, alone. But the same report showed when people bit the bullet, they had just as much fun as those who did the activity with another person.
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December/January 2017
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