It’s rare that a good idea is found at the bottom of a bottle…

WORDS & PHOTOGRAPHY JAMES VINCENT

TRAIL HUNTER EXPLORES THOSE MUST DO RIDES THAT SHOULD BE ON EVERY BRITISH MOUNTAIN BIKER’S BUCKET LIST.

It all started with a message from my sister back in September last year. “I’ve got you the coolest Christmas present ever.

You’re going to love it.” Really? I was genuinely intrigued. I mean, this was off the back of me giving her a smoke machine for her last birthday but I managed to keep that one to myself and didn’t need to forewarn her of its awesomeness (initially sceptical, she now loves it). What on earth could be so good that she felt the need to tell me about it that far in advance? Now, if it was a bike, I could understand the excitement, but let’s be realistic here – that’s never going to happen. Of course, I’ve been given bikes before for Christmas, but that was a long time ago, and they were from my parents. Not my sister.

Eventually, Christmas Day rolls around, and in the chaos of our large family gathering, I’ve completely forgotten all about the Present To End All Presents™, until she excitedly hands me a neatly wrapped tube. It’s definitely not a bike then.

I hurriedly tear the package open and inside is a single, folded A4 piece of paper. An event ticket.

To a whisky tasting in Bristol.

Erm… thanks, I mumble, and try my best to look as excited as my sister obviously is, but more importantly, I try not to disappoint the assembled throng of small children who sit staring at me, wondering why Uncle James isn’t bouncing up and down with glee.

What’s wrong with Bristol?

Now, before you all jump online and moan about what an ungrateful sod I am, let me explain. I live in Carlisle, and in the five hours it takes me to drive to Bristol, I could be visiting actual distilleries in actual Scotland, hitting up some epic riding spots along the way. I could be island hopping my way across the Inner Hebrides checking out Campbeltown, Laphroaig, and Ardbeg (a particular favourite), or heading north to the Spey Valley and really getting stuck in (actually, that sounds like a great idea for a trip – hold that thought).