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Digital Subscriptions > The Oban Times & Lochaber Times > 14th September 2017 > RETRO Roamer

RETRO Roamer

Retro Roamer - more late summer 1980s musings

 Local worthy making his way home up the hill at 2.30am on Saturday. With a very good shot in him, he was spotted and stopped by the ‘polis’ who wanted to know his plans for the rest of the early hours. ‘I’m going to a lecture,’ the bold boy advised. Came the not unexpected Constabulary response: ‘A lecture? At this time of day?’ ‘That’s right,’ slurred local worthy. ‘When I get home in this state the wife’s going to give me the longest lecture I’ve ever had in my life’!

Monday lunchtime in a town takeaway. In walks a customer, her head in the hood of her anorak because of the Fort rain and wind. She selects a piece of cheese and a couple of oatcakes. ‘Have you any garlic?’ she asks. To which the ever-alert counterhand replies: ‘You’ll have to go to the corner shop for that, madam’. ‘Madam’ looks at him and says: ‘You’re the only one in town who’s recognised me’! It was Thelma Barlow – Mavis Riley of Coronation Street fame. She was spotted later in the day when she had dinner in the Crannog. Was the ever-harassed Derek with Mavis? Well, I don’t really know.

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