Tom Fenton treads the fine line between England and Scotland, black ice and bog, all the while attempting condiment-based puns.

WORDS TOM FENTON PHOTOGRAPHY ANDY HEADING

Strange things happen in the early light of dawn, and sleepdeprived conversations are strangest of all.

It’s still dark when a couple of hours up the A1 from a 5am start, we stop for coffee. Or rather, Andy and Richie stop for coffee. I hate the stuff. They suggest mustard as a substitute. A spoonful? On the rocks? Boiled in a mug?

This goes on for quite some time. Luckily, mustard isn’t yet available at service stations on the A1, so we can’t test the theory. They then bet me that I can’t fit at least two references to mustard into this article. I promise not to lay it on too thick.

This conversation took place on the way to Northumberland – specifically, the Cheviots. We’re on our way to check out a somewhat unusual trail that runs right along the border between Scotland and England.

If you’ve not been, the Cheviots are a pretty special place. A clump of huge rolling hills plonked in the middle of nowhere, looming out of the surrounding land in a big grassy lump. Steep-sided and covered with grass and heather, they’re formed by a series of blunt spurs rising to a central ridge, interspersed with deep valleys and streams. They feel utterly deserted, especially outside summer. Once you’re up on the tops there aren’t even any trees, just open moorland. It feels like a fitting place for a border between two countries.

The only things breaking the peace are a couple of seriously large army firing ranges off to the west. I guess you can’t have everything.

With the exception of a few local woods that have been home to some pretty spicy downhill racing, you’ll not find much technical riding in the area. You’ll often not even find any tracks – or tyre tracks – for that matter. In five or six trips up here I’ve seen about ten people and none of them were on bikes. What you will get are huge uphill slogs and bouncy grassy descents on which to reach eye-watering speeds. You get incredible views that stretch out in all directions and complete peace and quiet in which to enjoy them. Got your taste buds tingling? As I said, a special place.