ELLA GAUCI investigates whether there’s any truth behind the myth

Laid prostrate in a rainbow-coloured coffin, surrounded by carabiners and posters of Gillian Anderson, lesbian sex takes its last breath. Around it, thousands of WLW couples bawl as they succumb to the cruel prophecy. Looking on, young sapphics stand aghast, watching the future of their sex life crumble before them. It’s a truth universally acknowledged that lesbians can’t have sex after they’ve been in a relationship for more than two years. Everyone knows that. The L Word even mentions it, which means it has to be true. Right?

Let’s cut the cameras. Dig the coffin back up. Put the posters of Gillian Anderson where they rightly belong (on my wall). Instead of quaking in our boots about the possibility of sex running out, it’s time we unpack lesbian bed death.

The term “lesbian bed death” initially cropped up in the 1980s, coined by psychologist Philip Blumstein and sociologist Pepper Schwartz after a study they conducted into the sex lives of American couples. Speaking to 788 lesbian couples, the study found that nearly half of lesbians only had sex once a month. Despite glaring issues within this study – including the small sample size and ambiguous questioning about what defined sex – the idea stuck. Quickly the concept of “lesbian bed death” infiltrated into the popular subconsciousness.