THROUGH THE BOGS OF TIME

TOM FENTON TOOK A TRIP TO DARKEST WALES TO REVISIT THE DOETHIE VALLEY – A TRAIL THAT HAS EVERYONE WE KNOW BUZZING.

WORDS TOM FENTON // PHOTOGRAPHY ANDREW HEADING

Until recently, I believed that Steven Seagal’s films were fantastic. He was never flustered, had ninja skills and an awesome ponytail… the perfect action man. Unfortunately, this was based on the memories of a teenage boy watching on a crackly TV set in the back bedroom. Now, many years later, I have rewatched those films and realised that they are utterly, utterly terrible. Except Under Siege. Point being, your mind can play tricks on you.

Holding that thought, I’m aware that my memories of the Doethie Valley might also be skewed. In my head, seven kilometres of immaculate singletrack snake down a wild Welsh valley. Red Kites play overhead, a beautifully clear river burbles below and the rolling hills are totally deserted. The only sounds are those of my tyres as I sweep round another perfect corner.

I’ve not ridden down the Doethie Valley for a good five years so is it going to go the way of Big Steve? Another cherished memory cast to the wolves? I start to doubt myself. I remember how far from anywhere the ride is and how it takes flippin’ ages to get there. How the first half of the ride is essentially one long fire road and how there’s no café within a tenmile radius.

‘Race leader on your right!’

Only one, OK, two ways to be sure.

As ever, there’s only one way to be sure. OK, two ways. I’m not about to nuke anything from orbit. [If you haven’t seen Aliens, a) shame on you and b) you really should. I guarantee it’s better than anything with Steven Seagal in.] I’m going to head down and reassure myself that the Doethie Valley is indeed one of the classic trails of the UK and one of those routes that you really need to ride.