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David vs. Whatsisname

I’m not sure I get the point of the story of David and Goliath. And just for clarity, I’m talking about the biblical story, not the 1970s claymation creep-fest that used to give me morality-based fever dreams. (What the hell is this? It looks like Rudolf or Heat Miser but it’s all Jesus-y. And why is the dog talking?) In the Bible, more specifically in the book of Samuel, David (our hero) fights Goliath (not our hero) because Saul and the Israelites1 are for some reason at odds with the Philistines. The Philistines send out Goliath, twice a day for forty days, to cream the living hummus out of any Israelite who even thinks about looking at him funny. Finally, some kid named David decides to go fight the significantly larger-than-himself Goliath, and by using a sling and some rocks slams the G-Man smack in the forehead, kills him, and wins. This is followed by three thousand years of abject peace in the Middle East.2 Yay, Bible!

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The War on Science, Anti-Intellectualism, and ‘Alternative Ways of Knowing’ in 21st-Century America