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Digital Subscriptions > Psychologies > No. 158 > Judgement and jealousy

Judgement and jealousy

On her journey to sexual fulfilment, Karla Newbey discovers that shame and disapproval can come from unexpected quarters

orgasmic life

The sun is shining, there’s a bottle of chilled wine on the table and we’re ordering tapas. I’m with a bunch of girlfriends; friends I’ve known for 20 years and with whom I’ve shared everything, from problems in my marriage, to bringing up my children, to the student parties of my youth. Busy lives mean we rarely get together now, but still, we have no secrets from each other.

A little fragile from sharing the story of my recent infatuation, I reapply red lipstick and adjust my dress. The waiter smiles at me and I smile back. It sounds like a simple exchange, but yes, I am flirting… Flirting used to be a mystery to me, but now I’m embracing my sexual energy. I’ve gained confidence and it’s something I’m learning to enjoy. He fetches us more ice, pours our wine, hovers attentively, and I giggle.

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