Hitting the age of 40 without taking ‘happy pills’ was a point of personal pride. I’d always thought of myself as someone who didn’t ‘do’ anxiety or depression – until I found myself in my doctor’s surgery, begging for something to make the unbearable feelings stop.
A series of stressful life events – from family conflict to criticism at work – had converged, until a difficult conversation used up the last of my emotional reserves, and I was suddenly completely overwrought, unable to stop crying. I moved through that weekend in a daze, unable to focus on anything except the dread.