Idle chat isn’t always silly. It can be playful, perk up your day and reveal profound truths – if you give it a chance and work at it

‘I have realised that the past and future are real illusions, that they exist in the present, which is what there is and all there is’

Alan Watts

In the light of recent times, when human connection has been in short supply, small talk has taken on a new meaning. No longer the rather dweeby and less interesting relative of meaningful conversation, chit-chat has grown large in importance. With no soirees for most of a year, small talk’s had little chance to corner us in the kitchen at a party as we politely dance with it, plotting our exit. Instead, it’s entertained us as we queued outside supermarkets, two metres apart. So, what’s the big issue with small talk?

I once read that small talk was the equivalent of dogs sniffing each other’s bottoms. I must confess, I’ve never liked it (small talk, that is), even though I’ve been praised for my skills in it.

I’ve always felt it’s an exchange of questions from one person who didn’t really care for the answer, with a half-hearted response from the other. And it’s been suggested my dislike of idle chatter is laced with snobbery. I’ve looked at this and wondered whether there’s some truth in it. Do I think small talk’s beneath me? The answer is no. I like deep and meaningful conversations, but I don’t want to engage on that level all the time. I don’t want always to work that hard. Conversation needs to be many things, such as the soothing balm to a hard day at work, and wise words to life’s conundrums – and the rest in between. It turns out, however, that I’ve failed to understand the point of small talk. It took a trip to the shops to illustrate its importance.