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HAVE YOUR SAY

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THANKS FOR WRITING TO US, WE LOVE HEARING WHAT YOU THINK

• Gone too soon

I have just finished reading the article in the March issue about losing an adult child and feel that I have to write to you. My lovely son, Robert, died 28 years ago at the age of 23.

He was living in London while we were in Scotland and I can still hear those dreadful words that he was dead, all these years later. I had spoken to him on the phone only a couple of nights before.

My husband, two daughters and I were absolutely poleaxed by the news. We have, of course, had to live our lives without him and I find I can go some time without thinking about him but then suddenly, out of nowhere, will come a trigger that brings him to mind and the pain is as bad as ever.

My younger daughter is going to Florida, as her partner hasn't been, and is worried because the last time she was there we went as a family and Robert was with us. She feels she's going to see Robert in so many of the places she is planning to go. Even after 28 years she still feels the hurt.

I visualise what he would be like now as a 52-year-old pilot, which he was undergoing training for when he died. No doubt with a wife and children.

I feel so much for the family you featured who lost their daughter only last December, as the 'first' birthday and Christmas without her will bring back memories of 'this time last year...'

I'm afraid we didn't try counselling as we knew that nothing could bring back Robert and that nothing could make us feel any better without him. It's true that time is a great healer, but the pain is still there from time to time, as raw as ever. Josephine Cunningham Wargrave, Berkshire

False economy

The councils of the UK should be thoroughly ashamed of themselves in closing down nearly all public toilets in towns, cities and villages, as reported in your March issue (The Great Inconvenience). It's disgraceful.

They say they care about health and safety but they obviously don't, otherwise they would make sure that public toilets are kept open everywhere. A lack of them drastically limits the lives of so many people, including myself. I have stopped going for much-loved days out because of the fear of not having easy access to public toilets due to some of my health conditions. The councils think that they are saving money, but at what cost?

It's so very wrong to ruin people's lives like this. There are other, healthier ways money could be saved. Closing public toilets takes away the freedom of so many people. Sue Just (Mrs} Kendal, Cumbria