The Rules
…for finding ‘the one’ in time for Valentine’s Day
THE RACE IS ON, HUN. Fire up those (selfesteem-destroying) dating apps and get swiping. Remember to flex your fingers beforehand — bend and snap! — and ignore any cramping. No pain, no gain.
TAP UP YOUR FOLKS FOR ADVICE. Sure, they’re miserable fuckers, but they must have been happy once. No? Why’d you get married then? Oh, shotgun wedding ’cos you were preggers with moi. Gotcha!