The ping of our mobile phone, the buzz of our headphones, the hubbub of another busy meeting… it feels like our ears are constantly ‘switched on’ – but how well are we really listening? Research suggests we take in just 25 per cent of what is said to us, and the average couple only spends 20 minutes a week listening to each other.
Not surprisingly, poor listening takes its toll. ‘When we are not heard, we feel hurt, deflated and let down,’ says communications coach Mary Hartley, author of How To Listen: Using Listening Skills ToBuild Better Relationships Through Communication (Kindle Editions, £2.32). ‘Being listened to fosters our sense of self-worth, and lets us know that our thoughts, feelings and ideas are valued.’